Mismatched Safe Places

We were having a smoke/coffee break and Boyfriend was telling me how hard it is to find the right engagement ring. I was freaking out mentally, but trying really hard to keep the conversation as light as he was.

The dream jumped.

I was staying in the house. The house that I've always dreamed about, that often defys physics and sometimes has different floor plans, but I know it has always been the house. I'd had a baby a few hours before (a home birth, apparently) but hadn't yet finished with that whole process of getting better. Though i was walking around, I wasn't yet allowed to handle baby (because I was still so messed up on pain/relaxation drugs). I was worried that I wouldn't know how to breast feed baby, but as soon as we relaxed into a chair together everything worked out just fine.

The dream jumped again. I was fighting inside a giant theatre. Only it was an us vs them sort of thing. I don't remember who they were, but it had something to do with Halo (which I have never played with any seriousness). I walked out on the balcony level of the theatre seating and shot the HUGE gun that I'd been carrying around. That was it, the last shot, the one that killed all my enemies and won the battle for us. We were all sitting on the balcony level talking about the battle and Mason decided that it hadn't been my shot that had finished off the battle. For some reason, this pissed me off. A lot.

I left the theatre for the hotel where we were all staying. A girl that is in my Art History class (whose name I believe is Ana, though I'm not sure) was in our room (the girls room) putting together collages and sketching out pictures of the battles. She asked me where I felt safe outside of home/apartment. While I was pondering the question, she used the term "Mismatched safe" explaining that it meant the places where you feel safe but don't have any real reason to feel safer there than in other places. For her: the Fine Arts Library, her cousin's porch but not the house, in her car on long drives, etc. The only thing I could think of was Boyfriend. I missed him and was tired of being on the road fighting this stupid war. I realized that he is my mismatched safe, because regardless of where we are together, I feel safe, happy.

I am so ready to be moving back home, to be done with school. It has infiltrated my dreams.

No time to remember things! Must study!

The weather/school has me stressed out (minus a very fun play in the snow around 3am this morning) and I haven't been remembering much of my dreams. I wake up and immediately start planning/thinking about homework or other things I need to do. Then later in the day at some point I'll think, "Wait, I did dream last night" but it's usually all gone by that point.

Sad days.

I was part of an extremely wealthy/famous family. Our house was huge and our property had a sizeable lake on it. There was a state road going through the middle, near the lake, that was a lot like Highway 1 in California that I was driving on to get to the airport/train station/bar in the closest town. I got there, went up to the counter, ordered a burger or something fairly uninteresting. People were staring at me as if i were a terrible person. It was obnoxious and unnerving so I left the guy a big tip and drove home.

At home there was a party going on for my mother's new pregnancy (though thinking about it, neither of the people that were my parents in the dream are my parents in real life). I didn't feel like dealing with her friends so I went up to my room (which had something like a theatre shop outside of it) and found the maid making fun of me with her friends/coworkers. They were mortified to see me walk in. I yelled at them to leave and cried myself to sleep on my bed.

When I woke up, I was absolutely determined not to let the day before make this day any worse. I was also fixed on building something (a shelf or a desk or something, I don't remember). I went over to the shop portion of the house and would have started working but there was a huge, fat spider (approximately the footprint of a deck of cards) sitting on the inside portion of the doorframe. I was too afraid to do anything, and also too paranoid to just leave it and hope it went away (what if it decided to make its way closer to my room and one day I woke up with that beast in bed with me?) My brother walked in and said "Cool spider. You're scared of them aren't you?" and slammed the door shut, squishing the spider for me.

I woke up to the text message that school was cancelled for the day because of Texas' inability to handle snow and ice. Neat.